Near the start of the first chapter from Odd Girl Out (2002), Rachel Simmons states, “Aggression is the hallmark of masculinity” (p. 17), and proceeds in the rest of the chapter to subvert this idea rather effectively.
Whether girls’ aggression manifests as relational aggression, indirect aggression, or social aggression, it is certainly a different breed of aggression as compared to most male aggression. Male aggression is generally physical; even most overt displays of male camaraderie mask themselves as physical aggression (e.g., a playful punch, a comical headlock, a collegial shove, and the ubiquitous—and always sports-related—pat on the butt). I suppose what I’m getting at is that Simmons provides a very clear—and very accurate, to my ears—analysis of female aggression that seems to support the comment I made during last week’s class: when girls have resorted to physical, no-holds-barred, kick-her-ass-at-any-cost-kicking-hairpulling-and-scratching-allowed violence, it’s because they have exhausted all other options for resolving the conflict or handling it through other means of aggression. Take my advice—you do not want to get in the middle of one of these battles.
Simmons’ work also reminds me of the film Mean Girls (2004) starring Lindsay Lohan. Tina Fey adapted the non-fiction book Queen Bees and Wannabes (2003) by Rosalind Wiseman into an intelligent and hilarious examination of the intricacies of adolescent female aggression. Highly recommended.
The topic of female aggression intrigues me, mainly because males have long been considered the more aggressive sex, and I’m beginning to believe that neither sex has a monopoly on aggression or violence. I don’t think that YA novels need to portray more “realistic” physical female aggression, but I think we (and teenagers) would certainly benefit from a more honest and genuine depiction of the idea that violence and aggression are not necessarily more characteristic of one gender or another.
Jim
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I was at a party where two highly educated, articulate women were teasingly arguing over whose cat was tougher. Over wine and time, one of them finally said "Yeah, but my penis is still bigger than yours." Obviously, this was tongue in cheek, yet maybe it speaks to the nature of our culture. In a competitive society, everyone (women too) wants to win. We can make the decision not to compete, but unfortunately, we will probably have to make it over and over again. Maybe adolescent girls/boys need to know this: One's nature, is an intellectual decision. Any
essentialists out there who disagree?
I don't know if it's just the increased attention to this topic, but over the last couple of years I've seen more subversive hateful behavior than my previous years of teaching. Maybe I'm just looking for it now, so I'm picking up on it. It's difficult to confront these kids and not get the sickeningly innocent, "Who? Me? I didn't say anything" response. I did have some success with one student when I said, "It's not normal to laugh at someone when they're crying. You need to think about getting some help." I don't think she ever got the help, but she did lay off the other girl, at least in my classroom.
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